After Saturday's post where I went on and on about all that's going on in the MishMash of my life.... it occurred to me that I may have given some of you the wrong impression.
From all the super sweet comments that I've read... I think you think I'm actually doing a GOOD JOB at all this stuff!
(That's me, laughing hysterically.)
I am no super woman. Trust me on this.
Don't think that I'm amazing or anything. I'm just an ordinary gal trying to do WAY TOO MUCH!
I'm juggling WAY to many things. And my balls are not all in the air! Oh, No! I've got balls flying out of control ALL OVER THE PLACE!!!! (Get your mind out of the gutter. That is NOT what I was talking about. If you want that - go check out Reyna's post!)
That became clear as crystal today.
So if you were feeling at all like a slacker after reading my last post - well, this will make you feel better.
So, Sweetpea started school last week. On Friday, she was supposed to turn in a homework assignment where she had traced the feet of everyone in her family. I got the paper out of her bookbag on Thursday night. I read it - I swear I did. But for some reason, I saw "September 10th" and thought it was the next week. Sweetpea even told me she needed to do her homework. I said, "Don't worry. We'll do it over the weekend." Then, in the middle of the afternoon, I was watching my student teacher teach a lesson and I actually PAID ATTENTION to the calendar. The calendar with the big red circle on the 10th.
"Oh, crap", I thought to myself.
Her teacher was much too gracious when I went to apologize. We did the assignment and sent it back today.
Today. When I see her class all come running outside for recess. Her class where just about everyone has on yellow.
"Oh, crap", I thought to myself.
"Was it yellow day?" I asked. "Yes."
Her teacher was, once again, too gracious when I apologized for my child who wore RED. (She did look super cute - but.... not the point.)
Her teacher was also way too gracious when I swore that I would get her school supplies (paper towels and tissues) to school TOMORROW!
Because.... "Oh, CRAP!!!", I thought.
I forgot them, AGAIN!!!
See? Suckity Suckity Suck Suck Suck.
I've got too much going on.
And who is paying the price? My sweet girl. That's who. That's not right.
She deserves a Mom who is THERE. Mentally AND physically.
And I've got too much going on.
Three weeks 'till our walk. We're winding up the t-shirt ordering. Dimes for Diabetes is underway. McTeacher night is scheduled. Chick-fil-A STILL won't call me back.
It's time to delegate. It's time to let some of it go.
Diabetes is a humbling disease.
It makes SURE that I know that I am NOT in control. I am NOT in charge. I am NOT perfect.
I don't like that. Not one little bit. But trying to fight that fact is impossible.
It's hard to be everything to everyone.
I want to be the best teacher for my students. I want to advocate for my daughter and all other living with Type 1. I want to be the best wife to my husband. I want to be the best friend to my "peeps" (both pancreatic and otherwise). I want to be the best daughter to my parents. And, more than anything, I want to be the best Mommy to Sweetpea..... and part of that is being the best pancreas!
It's a balancing act. It's like nailing jello to a tree. Or herding cats.
But I'm trying. I'm cutting out what's not essential so I can actually spend time with my kid and dress her in the right thing!!
So, see? I'm not superwoman. I'm just an ordinary gal trying to do the impossible!