* You walk into the pharmacy to drop off a prescription (for yourself) and the person behind the counter - who you don't ever remember meeting before- calls you and your child by name!
* You have ever said, "I'm going to test your blood sugar and if you're not high or low, you're going to time out!"
* You go out to eat without your diabetic child and you panic for a split second when you start to eat because you think you forgot to check your blood sugar.
* You carry around a purse the size of a small suitcase in order to have all of your supplies on hand.
* You have numerous old syringes rolling around in your car.
* You despise the "free cookies" at the grocery store and the "free suckers" at the doctor's office. (the doctor's office of all places...)
* People look at you funny when you talk about your child being "high".
* You can recite from memory how many carbs are in a single grape and m&m (approximately .5g, in case you're wondering).
* You wonder how many carbs are in dog food..... (long story)
* You get suspicious looks from the cashier at the grocery store when you point out the "free" gum to your child.
* You tell your child to give you the finger.
* You'd never give your child grapes or m&m's or pretzels or goldfish without counting them out first. Each individual one. And then you say, "NO SHARING!"
* You know exactly what a pancreas looks like and where it's located in the body.
* You have ever found a test strip... in the car, in a shoe, in your bra, or anywhere else you could think of.
* You have ever apologized to another parent for their child coming home with a test strip stuck in his hair (some people have pet hair... we have medical supplies...)
* There is no butter in your butter compartment. Just insulin.
* You've ever worried that if the supplies in your medicine cabinet shifted and all fell out when you opened the door, you might be buried alive.
* You've ever had your child ask if he or she could do something... to which you respond, "Sure - you can give it a shot".... to which the child responds, "I'm not eating! I don't need a shot!"
* When your child plays doctor, he or she does things like flick the play syringe to get rid of bubbles.
* The bottom of your purse looks like a candy store.
* Your child's sheets and pillowcases are all covered with little polka dots... of blood.
* You choose a comforter for your child's bed because it will hide the blood easier. (This gets really weird looks if you talk about this out loud at Target...)
* Older people comment on your child's cute "fanny pack".
* Other kids think your child carries around a cell phone.
* Halloween and Easter and Christmas mean getting candy.... and that's kind of the same thing as getting medicine. And you specifically choose items that will be good to treat lows.
* You ever judge your day or your child's day based on the 24 hour CGM graph.
* You have more doctors on speed dial than your Grandmother.
* You've ever put EMLA cream on a friend's child before she got her ears pierced.
* You have a minor freak out if the waitress removes your child's plate before you can judge the amount he or she ate.
* You make art out of medical waste.
Photo courtesy of the SUPER CRAFTY LAURA @ Houston We Have a Problem
* Your child waits to eat... even though everyone else is eating and her plate is in front of her... because she forgot that you already tested her and she knows she can't eat before testing.
* You've ever spent half of a meal looking up carb counts on your phone. And this is the reason you got a SmartPhone in the first place.
* You hear people talking about "pumps" and you are confused until you realize that they are talking about shoes - not medical equipment.
* You tell your child that they MUST bounce in the bounce in the bounce house if they would like that cotton candy at the fair.
* You get to go through the "special" lane in the airport and always get a "special massage" when going through security.
* Your carry on is full of medical supplies.
* You can guess your child's blood sugar correctly before you test - it's all based on MOOD.
* Your child falls asleep in the car and you worry that he or she has passed out due to hypoglycemia.
* You hear beeping and ask your child, "Is that you?"
* Your child hears beeping and checks his or her cgm.
* You speak an entirely new language.
* Your child asks to "pee on a stick" and you know it's not a stick that came from a tree.
* Your child asks, "Am I low?" with a hopeful gleam in her eyes.
* Your cell phone is attached to you like a third arm because you get calls all day long asking what to do in certain situations.
* Your list of books to read for pleasure consists of books like "Pumping Insulin" and "Think Like a Pancreas".
And I totally recommend this book, by the way!
* You schedule vacations to places where other D families live - not places that traditional vacation destinations.
* You can't remember your age but you can rattle off carb counts, blood sugars and A1c's with no hesitation.
* Your child asks when he or she can ride in the ambulance and go to the hospital again.
* Your child likes the hospital because of the "room service".
* You pick a restaurant based on the quality of their nutritional information - not the quality of their food.
* Shopping for new school clothes includes new pump pouches.
* You wonder if it's possible to die of exhaustion.
* You can live without milk, bread, or water.... but NOT JUICE BOXES.
* Your life has ever been divided into BEFORE and AFTER.
* Your child is the bravest person you know.
* Your very best friends are people you've never met who live in your computer. And you could not imagine life without them!
* Even though the doctor tells you it's okay to sleep through the night and you're so exhausted you can't remember your name, you still get up in the middle of the night to check your child's blood sugar because she means more to you than anything else in the world and you just have to make sure she makes it safely to morning.
Do you have one? Can you think of more?
Add your favorite as a comment below! It's good to laugh at this crazy life we lead!
Want another good chuckle about how we're all in this craziness together??? Go check out Denise's video on her blog My Sweet Bean and Her Pod. It is HI- LAR- I- OUS! I am going to be singing her Type 1 D Mom's Song for a loooooong while! It's a must see!